It was 1 year and 6 days ago when I decided to leave. He had been so bad that I was trembling. Small, tiny, but resonating right through me like a hum. Right down to my cells. I still do tremble like that sometimes, and this morning is one of those times. We aren’t going […]
READ MORETag: Parenting
Back To School
The 6 weeks holidays. The End. The children have been singing Ed Sheeran throughout.(“I’m in Lurv with yer bar-de”..) It is now etched into my mind and circles around in my brain throughout meetings, discussions and even arguments – there have been a few. It’s been a pleasure, don’t get me wrong but;
READ MOREWorld Book Day School Run
My Darth Vader, (on blue scooter) meets potential rival, Darth Vader, (on red scooter). They give each other the Death Stare, but no-one seems to have been harmed.
READ MOREThe Self Adhesive Moustache
All 4 of them were wearing little self adhesive moustaches.. They were having a ball. But apparently you should not poo while wearing one, or at least according to my 4 year old….
READ MOREStar Wars Egg Box
How the fight between a Five year old and a 9 year old began…
READ MOREParenting. What about ‘Childing?’
When your kids want something there really is no excuse available to you that they will accept. Wether it’s having another ice cream, watching another episode of Paw Patrol, not having a bath, or when you, yes YOU (remember!?) want to leave the playground, because you want a wee so much that you know one sneeze […]
READ MOREParents: New Washing Revolution
A revolutionary new washing machine designed with babies, toddlers, and pre schoolers in mind. Works right up until they leave home. #AllTypesOfShit
READ MOREA 4 year olds’ Argument for Being Vegetarian
It was an accidental argument for being vegetarian , but non the less a good one:
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The Name I Remember you By #4
Thanks Kate for your contribution to my Names On People’s Phones series:
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Top 10 Unrealistic Promises for a Mother
If you manage even 2 of these you’re doing brilliantly.
READ MOREBranding That Turns Mums into Morons
I wandered into the store called Joules earlier. To see if they had any little girls dresses, when I noticed the brightly decorated muslin cloths. ‘Hmm pretty’ I thought, I went over, and, written in big text across the front of the packaging was written “A mum’s best friend“. “Fuck off” I thought, why not write […]
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Me Time.
A nice relaxing swim. Followed by getting changed in a room full of women who have it seems, long since past caring about privacy. I’m guessing they too have had kids.
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Arriving Late to the Parent and Toddler Group. (Bum) Cracking.
I got there just in time for ‘circle time’.
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